The Gifts of My Childhood
I was born in 1968. It was a tumultuous year, and when I read about it, these are the things that stand out to me: Vietnam War, the Civil Rights movement, student protests worldwide, Martin Luther King, Jr. assassinated, Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. Assassinated, 50 women protest the Miss America Pagent — part of the "Second Wave of Feminism," Apollo 7 launched — first live broadcast from orbit, Led Zeppelin has their first live performance, Richard Nixon wins the presidential election, The Beatles release the "White Album," and Elvis makes his comeback! Wow, that's a lot!!!
What incredible energy to be surrounding me when I was born. There was a heavy combination of sadness, anger, determination, and hope.
My favorite astrologer, Ruby Falconer, shared that we are in a similar astrological pattern right now as we were in 1968, and I believe it! Look at everything that is going on in the world right now.
I am also traveling through my personal transformation, a rebirth that is sometimes painful, just like in 1968. What is now super clear to me is when I stay the course, acknowledge the pain, and go into it, I experience deep healing and personal freedom.
I wanted to take some time to reflect on the gifts of my childhood. Throughout my healing journey, I have shared some hard things about my young life. As I reflect on that, I appreciate how the hard things from my childhood are my medicine to help prepare me for this moment.
I often say that starting in my teenage years. I had to "figure it out on my own." That presented many hardships around my body, sexuality, intimacy, and relationships. I also experienced many opportunities to grow and learn how to do things differently rather than always doing things as my family has always done them. I traveled the longer, more challenging road to come back to my true self. It was exactly what needed to happen to allow me to begin to break the cycle of shame in my family's female line.
My desire to move to New York City when I was 24 created the foundation for my transformation. It was one of those times in my life that I had a clear, strong knowing that it was time to take a leap of faith. I listened to my inner knowing. I stepped away from my family of origin and into a different culture.
My mind opened to many different cultures from around the world. I worked with and became friends with people from around the world, including Israel, Ukraine, Russia, Belarus, China, Japan, India, Lebanon, Palestine, Scotland, Ireland, Britain, Haiti, Trinidad, Egypt, and Pakistan. I had friends of all different colors and sexual orientations. I lived in the West Village — home to the LBGQT community in NYC. As I said, my mind opened and opened and opened more.
The independence that I experienced growing up was now serving me. I approached each new possibility like an adventure: Finding a place to live, adjusting to urban life, finding a job, learning how to use public transportation, and truly living on my own away from family.
Whenever I made a big decision about my life, my parents didn't impose their opinions on me. They were always very hands-off. They essentially gave me enough rope to hang myself. I never hung myself, but I came close a few precarious times (stories for another time), and luckily it all worked out, and I learned big lessons.
There is immense power in navigating life independently and "figure it out for myself." I am very grateful that I have the opportunity to do that repeatedly.
I sincerely appreciate my Mom and Dad and their unique journeys. My love for them has deepened as I understand that everyone's journey is steeped in the medicine their soul needs. My transformation is their medicine too!
When my daughters become adults, they will have their own healing path. They will investigate their childhood, and it will be hard for me to face, but their transformation will be my medicine as well. No one gets out of their childhood without wounds that they carry through their life.
I am proud to say that I am now a woman who loves and accepts herself, is able to experience love and intimacy, has found spirituality, lives with less fear every day, and I have the tools and resilience to figure things out and handle obstacles as they arise. I see this showing up more strongly in my daughters as well. As I have healed, they have gained more confidence.
I truly hope my parents see this and are proud of their contributions to my healing, which extends to our ancestors and our descendants.
I believe that now is the time. As Alice Walker wrote, “We are the ones we have been waiting for.” For every person who looks in the mirror and begins to heal and love themself, they will also heal the world. Our world is crying out for healing right now!
If you are interested in releasing shame and cultivating love and trust in yourself, please join my e-mail list by going to ExposingTheRoots.com. I also have several offerings listed on the Events page on my website: Women's circles, retreats, one-on-one coaching, and much more coming in the future!
Tina Green is the "Self-Love Queen," and she is the Founder, Owner, and Life Coach at Exposing The Roots. Through her life coaching, she partners with women to assist them in increasing their self-love. She believes that when a woman learns to love herself, everything changes. Tina is a trained Life Coach, Chef, and Author. She also has 20 years of experience as an executive in non-profit and financial services. Tina lives with her husband and two teenage daughters in Northern California, where she is a personal transformation enthusiast, foodie, outdoor adventurer, gardener, and cook.